Merry Christmas Champs ! Love and miss you loads xxx 25 Dec 2013


Morning boys , I know it’s 6 am but I am sure you both are up and about to see if Santa came !

Just want to wish you both a very Merry Christmas and tell you both how much I love you and miss you and sorry again that I am not allowed to share in this special day with you both!

Thank you for the little email I assume mum or her spokes person sent last night from you both , broke my heart even more !

Have a fun day boys , play your little hearts out !

Love you both always ….

Dad xx

A Christmas wish for my little men – 24 Dec 2013


Hello my little O’s ,

I know it’s early but I guess as today goes on it will become much harder to write this post to you both…

I hope you both are very well today and well excited for tomorrow ….

My Christmas wish for my Oscar and Oliver

1. I wish for you both to be happy always
2. I wish for you both to be safe always
3. I wish for you both to always love each other and be best friends
4. I wish for you both to maybe understand this current mess…. One day
5. I wish for you both to be able to forgive mum and I for this mess you are stuck in .. One day
6. I wish for you both to be healthy strong little men always
7. I wish for you both to always keep smiling as you do now
8. I wish for you both to learn sharing is not the worst thing in the world
9. I wish for you both to know you are part of two families who love and adore you not just one
10. I wish for you both to know I have never walked away from you no matter what people tell you
11. I wish for you both to learn , love and live like their is no tomorrow always
12. I wish for you both that all your little dreams come true always
13. I wish for you both to know that you both will always have my heart even if I might never be in yours
14. I wish for you both to know each day how much you are loved and missed by people all over the world
15. I wish for you both to learn that people are not always what they seem , however much you would like to believe different, listen to your gut it will always be right , I unfortunately did not do that when I met you mum and her father …. Look where that left me …
16. I wish for you both to always believe in Christmas and magic , dream , imagine as nothing is impossible if you believe in it or want it bad enough…..
17. I wish for you both that mum will allow you to have a puppy … You two will have so much fun with a little friend to protect you and be by your sides…..

I think my final wish for you both this year is that the 3 of us get to spend some normal natural time together but then again this might just be my so called personality order talking, lol

Boys I hope you are happy and well looked after and having loads of fun as it would break my heart even more if I have to know you are not……

The picture above I thought would make you both giggle , I hope you both have set up all your spy equipment as you might be able to get a glimpse of Santa and his gang when they come to see you both tonight …. Make sure the milk is warm and the carrots are fresh please….lol


The 2nd picture I found of us 3 on your first Christmas Eve , made me smile .. Good memories of us 3 boys …..

Well boys I will wish you both a huge massive gigantic Merry Christmas for tonight and I guess tomorrow also … I miss and love you both so much , I am sorry again for not being allowed to see you both or speak with you or in fact send you a little gift but this is what mum wants , so I guess nothing us 3 can do about it for now ……..

Be happy , be festive and have fun champs ….

O and you need to go to bed early tonight or else Santa might not stop at mums house …. No monkey business please……lol

I hope to see you both a little later tonight in your new pjs under our big old green Christmas tree , can’t wait to see you both and wish you both a dream Merry Christmas and give you both a huge double dream cuddle …..

Night , night pals , happy Christmas dreams ….

Miss and love you both so , so very much !…

Once again pals I would like to wish you both a very , very Merry Christmas ….wherever you are being kept hostage at the moment….

Love you so much champs …

Dad xx

Daily update for my Boys 23 Dec 2013


Hello little Champs ,

How are my muppets doing today ? I guess well excited and festive ….

The picture today is to show you both the Big man is all packed and seems to be on the move already to make his way to Chester , I hope you two are ready for him …. You might even get to see him , who knows…..

Just realised its a month today from the big 39th birthday for me … Scary to think I am that old already but then I guess if you take all the abuse and domestic violence and intimidation , blackmail etc. I had to endure from your mum and Steve and Simon the past 5 years no wonder I look 60 , lol , but least I can say I am a survivor and I know they will never break me no matter how much they as a family try and gang up on me and tell people only one side of a story and leave out the real facts … But at least I know when you are old enough you will be able to read the almost 8000 pages of documents and make up your own minds on things like why Cafcass gave mum 3 months to sober up before they did her alcohol testing ? Because they knew the test can only look back 4 weeks ? Or why because she says she takes loads of pain killers everyday they decided to not test her as they knew the test would show the true result …. All little things mum and Steve are not telling people on Facebook …. Selective reporting as the psychologist said

O I had to go to the bank this morning , bad idea I guess the whole country is trying to get cash out of the bank for Christmas , I think we forget how busy the banks are here but I must admit they are a 10000 years ahead of the UK and Dubai banking system , o and you deal with people which is always nice ….

So not sure what you two monkeys have been doing today but I hope you are both wearing your raincoats as I see the weather is not so great in the North now for the next couple of days… So I hope you both a dry ,warm, safe and well cared for as it’s not a nice time of the year to struggle while all the adults around you just want to get drunk all the time ….

Have you two been messing with the gifts under the tree yet ? I am sure if you take the wrapping of at the back mum will not notice ….lol

Tomorrow night is the big night for us here in Africa so please know you will be in our hearts and thoughts even more then what you are each day…. I am just so sorry that we are not able to say hello to you both or wish you both a Very Merry Christmas , but I guess that is what mum and Steve wants so they can tell you , ‘see he does not care about you ‘ boys you have no idea how wrong they will be when they tell you that tomorrow night … But not a thing we can do about it as you two are their hostages and will be I guess for the next couple of years and till you are able to stand up against them all ….

Well boys I hope you will have a little fun and festive spirit over the next couple of days and just know they can’t not control or dictate to you forever as they have tried to do with me and the rest of their family … As Steve and mum says the truth always prevails ……

As always my little men I can’t wait to see you both a little later under our big old green tree in dream land , I will be waiting to give you both the biggest bear cuddles in the world … And to tell you how much I miss and love you both……

Night , night pals , happy dry , warm ,safe festive dreams……

I love you both more than life and always will….

Love you my little O’s….

Dad xx

Boys please read this as it is what you are being subjected to daily by your family , Please do not see good in this bad habit ever ! ,

Why you shouldn’t let your children see you drinking this Christmas: It could turn them into problem drinkers like me, says PHIL ROBINSON
Phil doesn’t drink in front of his sons because of alcohol’s harmful effects
There’s been a ‘meteoric rise’ in the number of alcohol-related deaths
This is because of young people drinking heavily in their teens
A survey reveals that one in five 11 to 15-year-olds who had recently drunk had had alcohol bought for them by their parents

PUBLISHED: 22:46 GMT, 22 December 2013 | UPDATED: 22:47 GMT, 22 December 2013
65 shares 94View

What did you drink at the weekend? A pre-Christmas glass of mulled wine? A warming mug of eggnog? Over the next couple of days, perhaps you’ll have a Buck’s Fizz at breakfast and a cheeky pre-lunch sherry.
Maybe there will even be a Baileys as you sink into the sofa after downing several glasses of wine with your turkey. After all, ’tis the season to be merry.

Sober celebration: Phil, with his three sons, refuses to drink in front of them
But have you ever stopped to think about the effect all this conspicuous consumption of alcohol – inextricably linked, as it is, to both celebration and relaxation – has upon the children in your family?
I was just ten when I stole my first drink at a family wedding in 1983, but even now I can remember how much I wanted to be a part of this grown-up, glamorous world – one that was accompanied by the clattering of ice and chinking of glasses.
In a pattern that would continue for the next 20 years – a period in which I became dangerously and excessively reliant on alcohol – I wasn’t able to stop at one drink. While the adults danced, I toured the room looking for more.

The tables were groaning with glasses of all shapes and sizes. I picked up a goblet of Liebfraumilch, the then-ubiquitous sweet German wine.

I took my first sip: it tasted like ice-cold apple juice. I glugged down the rest and wobbled around the table sipping rum and Cokes (more please), gin and tonics with a bitter tang (no thanks), and finished at least two glasses of sherry, which tasted like cough syrup.
Nobody seemed to notice, and I wanted to try them all, every drink that I’d seen adults with, both in real life and the glamorous world of TV.
It was only staring at the blurred landscape on the car ride home that I became aware of my altered reality and threw up. Mum blamed it on too much trifle.

Alcohol is everywhere: Phil believes his entire generation is bringing up its children to see drink as a part of everyday life
Had my parents known what I had been up to, I’d have been severely punished. Even though I felt ill, I didn’t associate this with alcohol – all I remembered was the buzz, the warm contentment.
We were all a little naive about health in the Eighties – still smoking, drinking, and eating red meat most nights of the week. But in the health-conscious 21st century, with all we now know, you might assume society is more savvy, sensible and strict about children and alcohol.
It seems not.
In November this year, two shocking pieces of research were published. One study revealed that one in five 11 to 15-year-olds who had drunk alcohol in the previous month said it had been bought for them by their parents.
Meanwhile, Britain’s top liver disease expert, Professor Sir Ian Gilmore, reported a ‘meteoric rise’ in alcohol-related deaths as a result of young people drinking heavily in their teens.
‘Liver specialists are seeing people as young as in their 20s dying due to alcohol,’ he said. ‘If the increase carries on at the same rate, we could see up to a quarter of a million preventable deaths from liver disease in the next 20 years.’

Tanked up Brits: In 2004 it was estimated that ech adult consumed about 11.5 litres of alcohol that year

Sadly, I wasn’t surprised. My entire generation is bringing up its children to see drink as a part of everyday life – and at no time more so than at Christmas, when it’s estimated that the average adult will spend £75 on drink.
Alcohol is everywhere and TV advertising, filled with beautiful people happily quaffing drink, is the beating heart of our booze-worshipping culture.
As a child, my brain was full of slogans: lager that stays sharp to the bottom of the glass, the amber nectar. The Webster’s Yorkshire bitter whippet made me laugh, and I wanted to follow the Hoffmeister lager bear. The beer, wine and spirits industry and supermarkets spend £800 million a year on TV advertising, which generates a whopping £37.7 billion a year in revenue.
Companies promote alcohol as the magic key to affluence, togetherness and fun; the natural accompaniment for every imaginable family occasion.
The truth is that alcohol all too easily becomes the enemy of easy socialising. It exacerbates depression and having too much causes you to become withdrawn to the point where you can only socialise comfortably by being drunk.
But children bombarded by advertising images get only one side of the story. The problem took off in my parents’ generation. Raised in the Fifties, where the only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Advocaat that lived in a cupboard until Christmas, they regarded drinking as a treat. Wine was too expensive and the cheap stuff was unpalatable.
During the Eighties boom, however, much of the country – my parents included – experienced a boost in household income. They could now afford to drink regularly, and with this new affluence came what seemed like a more glamorous lifestyle.

Indoctrinating: Alcohol is promoted as a reward that will make grumpy people happy and sad people laugh
My favourite childhood memories were watching Mum, a teacher, and Dad, a director at an engineering firm, spending Friday night with our neighbours, mostly professionals and small business owners. I remember them laughing as they drank to wind down at the end of the week. To a child, the message that alcohol was a reward was clear: it made grumpy people happy, sad people laugh. It was a powerful, wordless form of indoctrination.
I kept drinking sneakily at every family occasion. And by the age of 14, I was adept at helping myself at parties while the adults weren’t looking. I can’t remember a time that my school friends or I couldn’t get our hands on alcohol. There was so much booze sloshing around our parents’ homes that no one needed to set foot in an off-licence.
Our parents knew nothing. While we were allowed a small beer or shandy on a special occasion, they would never have expected we would take such liberties with their trust. And no one warned us about the perils of alcohol.
We were lectured on the deadly threat of heroin, but never about the nation’s fix of choice: a drug that kills 10,000 people a year and is responsible for one-third of all hospital admissions. By the time I went to college I had no boundaries around alcohol.
A group of us who drank with equal ferocity would head out for a fry-up on a Saturday morning to mop up our hangovers and then wait for the pubs to open again at 11 am. It seemed normal.
Of my close-knit circle of five friends, three of us went on to develop alcohol and substance abuse issues in our 20s.
After college, I continued to drink heavily through the first half of my 20s until I found myself in a doctor’s surgery in 1998 in the grip of a nervous breakdown.

Booze-worshipping culture: The beer, wine and spirits industry and supermarkets spend £800 million a year on TV advertising
My doctor asked how many drinks are too many and I replied: ‘Eight?’ He said: ‘One is too many – if you are an alcoholic.’ Of course, I was not a full-blown alcoholic, but did I have a problem with alcohol? You bet!
So I quit drinking for the next ten years, determined to clean my life up. I believe quitting alcohol remains the most important move anyone can make to resurrect their mental and physical well-being.
The process of recovery means rejecting old habits, staying away from pubs and nightclubs. You feel lost and lonely, often. The upside is that you see your old self with some clarity. I also watched the drinking of my friends sky-rocket.
Drink is everywhere. I remember attending the Christmas play at my three-year-old son’s nursery and being offered mulled wine.

Dangerous: There has been a ‘meteoric rise’ in alcohol-related deaths as a result of young people drinking heavily in their teens
Take your children to a toddler’s party and there’s a good chance adults will be offered a glass of wine or a bottle of beer. This makes me despair. Today’s children rarely see adults socialising without a drink. We are teaching our children that booze belongs everywhere.
My wife never saw her parents drink when she was growing up, as they were both teetotal. As a result, she has no impulse to do so herself. Dinner is complete without a bottle of red. No birthday party requires champagne.
After a decade without alcohol, I started drinking again a year ago because I felt healthy enough to do so. These days I drink (and even get drunk) occasionally with friends, but rarely at home in front of my three sons, aged seven, nine and 11.
If I want a drink, I have to make a conscious effort to go to the pub. Buying wine and beer at the supermarket and putting it in the fridge next to the orange juice normalises an addictive drug. It is the surest route to developing a family habit. Instead, I am a happy, occasional drinker. I don’t preach abstinence to my sons, but I do think they need to know the dangers.
If they ask me about alcohol, I share some of the details that the supermarkets and brewing giants don’t care to mention. That alcohol is habit forming; that it makes you look ropey and old; and causes physical diseases and mental illnesses in otherwise healthy people. The message is this: do as I do – not as I did.

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Daily update for my Boys 22 Dec 2013


Hello Boys

How are my champs doing on this lovely lazy Sunday afternoon ? I hope oki doki ….

Well I just got back from brunch with the Jenkings 5 , lol and David and Claire and their two little men , haven’t seen them for years , the stay in Denver now… The little Jenkings 3 was well excited about the gifts I bought them , but I have said they can’t open them until Christmas Eve , lol don’t think it will work but hey I tried , was lovely spending time with them all and seeing all the little ones play at the huge play area and emptying their mum and dads wallets of R 5.00 coins for the play ball vending machine …. Reminded me of the machine you two loved to mess around with at the soft play we use to go to on Sunday mornings , with James and Katherine and Harrison,

I wonder if you have seen Harrison since you left Horsham ,makes me smile when I think how he wanted to go on the soft play holding my hand and you Oliver just wanted to go with James down the big slide , Oscar I use to smile so much as you were dead happy playing on the ground level , I guess that’s all changed now and you must have become a bit of daredevil yourself … Guess I will never get to see or experience those type of moments with you two again ,thanks to mum and Steve and their big plan to brake our bond ……

O before I forget mum emailed me or I guess Steve at 3 am this morning with some elf electronic greeting card but I am not able to open it on my iPad , not sure what it was or what it was about and why all of sudden , mum or should I say Steve her official spokes person decided to email me , but when I email them to ask about you both and Oliver’s operation they ignore me , so I guess they need to decide if we are communicating or not , I personally want nothing to do with either of them in my life again seeing that they will not even allow me now to see or get pictures of you both… But you know what boys however hard they try they can’t erase my memories or my heart , I know they would love to but that is one thing neither of them can ever do , please always remember that they can’t do it to you either how ever hard they try….

Your blog had more than 1500 visitors yesterday , makes me so proud to know that there is so many people all over the world that care and love you both although some of them have and I guess will never meet you , you had 69 people just from Ireland yesterday ….

I digress , the picture today made me smile , hope it shows you both that sometimes we do things in our own way in Africa … No reindeer needed lol …. Hope you two find it a little funny also…

Well boys I hope you had a nice fun ,safe happy day whatever you did , and I hope that the next couple of days will be great fun full of excitement waiting for Santa ,sorry that I am not allowed to share in any of it with you … Maybe one day boys … Who knows….

So boys as always I hope to see you both a little later under our big old green tree in dream land …. Can’t wait to hold you both for a little bit and tell you that I love you….

Night, night pals , sweet happy place dreams as always …..

I love and miss you both mega huge big truck loads full … Always….

Love you champs …..

Dad xxx

Ps , Ouma asked that I send you the picture below and a huge cuddle from her and Oupa also xx


Daily update for my Boys 21 Dec 2013


Hello Little O’s ,

How are my champs doing today ? I really hope well..

Justine posted the picture on her Facebook yesterday , thought it was very appropriate to our 3 ‘s situation…. Maybe one day boys ……

So what have you two done on this great Saturday ? Maybe you went to the Zoo or the soft play or maybe you have just been clowning around at home in your playroom.. Whatever you did I hope you had a fantastic time … Full of smiles and happy times….

I had a very nice night with Brett and Sanet last night, was great seeing them again , I think they would love to meet you both one day also , you never know ….

Tomorrow I am going for brunch with the Jenkings family and all the little ones , looking forward to seeing Maddison and the twins Liam and McKenna, Liam makes me smile so much as all he wants to do is play with a bucket of water and a brush and then he just keeps cleaning stuff all the time he is such a cutie, McKenna is a little bit more reserved but lovely , I can’t believe how big Maddison is now , I think when mum and I saw her last she was a little older then what you both are now , she is gorgeous…. We said we will go somewhere where the little ones can play and run wild while we have brunch , so should be great fun…..

I did not get up to much today , had a bit of a late start , just felt like I needed to sleep a bit later ,I guess holiday mode is starting to set in , which I guess is not so bad thing after all the events of the last year……

I hope you two are being good boys and that you have your carrots , biscuits and milk on standby for the big visit next week …. Not long now ….. I wonder if you two realise , I guess you are old enough this year to know something fun and festive is happening next week ….

I saw Daniel had a school play at his school , made me think if you two had one at school before the shut down , would have so loved to see your little smiles while you were performing or even just see your faces light up while the older kids performed……I guess not meant to be …..

Well boys I hope you are warm , happy and well looked after ……

As always I shall see you both a little later under our big old African tree in dream land , can’t wait to give you both a huge cuddle……

Night , night pals , happy place dreams please ….

I miss and love you both more than you will ever know I guess….

Love you little men…

Dad xx

Daily update for my Boys 20 Dec 2013


Hello Muppets ,

How are my champs doing on this lovely day ? I hope well….

I must say boys if I do not see the inside of a shop again until next year I would be very happy indeed … Lol , guess it’s all part of the holidays , seems that everybody that have nothing to do is doing it in the mall….lol

I am going for dinner tonight with my friends Brett and Sanet at a very nice little Italian in Brooklyn , am looking forward to seeing them as I have only been able to catch up once with them since I have been in and out of South Africa so much the past two months.

I hope to see the Marx and Jenkings families also before Christmas so I can do my Santa drop for all their little ones …. Guess they are the only little ones I can spoil a bit this year seeing that I am not allowed to spoil you both or even send you a little gift as per mums instructions … As I said I will keep the I owe you’s until we meet again and then I will try and make it up to you both as best as I can.

I wonder what you two have been doing today …. I have this picture in my head of mum trying to get you two to sit in the shopping trolley at Tesco but you two are not having it and want to explore and look at all the cool things in the shop …..part of being little boys , so I am sure a little bit running wild in public is not the worst thing in the world , hey boys …. As long as you are safe and having a giggle … All good !

Can’t believe it is weekend again , the weeks are flying by , can’t believe it has already almost been a month again since I saw you both or were allowed to speak with you … Breaks my heart if I am honest as I know you are growing and changing so much each day and I am missing it all because mum and Steve says so , really , really sad if you ask me , but hey I guess by now I should know I have no say when it comes to you both as this is what Steve makes mum do to ensure she can live of him because she does not want to work and would rather let Steve run her life and yours …

I also find it very amusing that Steve is still getting your Aunty Sheila to follow your blog by email , and this after I told her I want nothing to do with any of them in my life again when she tried to add me as a friend on Facebook again after I deleted her,maybe when you are a little older you can show them all that your blog is now ranked number 1 on google and bing so they all can just go to the page and read it, same as I can see who reads it daily , for people that don’t want me to have contact with you they sure all are great followers of your blog , lol guess I must have known they will keep stalking me online as they have done over the past 10 months.

Well boys whatever you both have planned for the weekend I hope it’s fun and safe , I hope you have a warm meal that’s not out of a microwave as that is all you ever got from mum as she always said she has no time …. Always time for a glass of wine or large Brandy ,but never time for a home cooked meal for you two …. Guess that will never change ….. Really sorry you both are stuck in this horrible unnatural environment mum and Steve is hell bent on keeping you in….

Boys as always I can’t wait to see you both a little later under our big old green tree , so I can see you both are safe and looked after , can’t wait to give you both a huge cuddle and tell you that I love you both so very much….

Night , night pals sweet happy place dreams of us 3 getting to spend some normal time one day ….

Love you both to the moon and back and miss you more ….

Love you boys ….always

Dad xxx

Daily update for my Boys 19 Dec 2013


Hello little O’s ,

How are my champs today ? I hope fantastic…..

Boys the picture is care of Ouma again , she thought you two would enjoy seeing the lioness with her two little cubs( we named them Oscar and Oliver)Makes me sad knowing you two will never get to see or experience scenes like that in its true sense in places like the Kruger National Park where these pictures are taken… I must say it is one of the most humbling experiences being so up and close to wildlife in their natural environment…. Maybe one day hey boys , who knows what the future holds for us 3.

I went with Ouma today to the hospital again, I guess this was her last trip now for this year…made me smile as the service level seems to be just as poor as the NHS , but I guess in the UK you can’t complain as you get it for free, not so much the case here … But again I guess that’s Africa things get done on African time …lol

Ouma then took me to this huge butchery near the hospital for some biltong , I think mum went with us once also before you two were born , the shop is full of old antique things , loads and loads of toy cars from all over the world , I think you two would have gone mad for it and would have had such a fun time playing around with all the cool stuff….

Also got the email confirmation yesterday that my container have now left the UK , looking forward to unpacking my stuff as I have been living out of a travel bag now since 4 October already … I am all for traveling lite but I guess you always need or look for stuff when you can’t get to it… Lol

I am sorry but your other train table town thing I guess you will now never get to see again as it was packed in the container … Will have to see in Jan when I get the container who has space and little ones that will love and enjoy it as much as you two did ….don’t worry I will make sure it goes to a good loving home , at least that way it will bring some joy to a little one…..

It’s quite cool here today , it rained all of last night again, still think you two would have had so much fun here this time of the year. Oupa had a bee in his bonnet this morning that we should go to the beach for a couple of days next week but I must admit Ouma and I are not sure that is the best idea this time of the year as the holiday towns are crazy busy this time of the year and just way to over crowded ….

So not sure what you two muppets have been doing today but I am sure it was full of fun and smiles …. I hope you two are being good boys for mum because that’s what Santa checks on before he comes to see you next week… I hope as I said yesterday you got some extra carrots for Rudolf and his friends … O and some Amarula for Santa , maybe not the best idea , sorry ,milk maybe a better options as I am sure Santa will not see a drop of the Amarula if mum knows it’s in the house , lol

Well boys I hope you are safe , happy warm and well looked after …. I will see you both again tonight under our big old green tree in dream land … Can’t wait to give you both the biggest double bear cuddle in the world and to tell you both how much I love and miss you …

Night , night pals , happy festive dreams….

I miss and love you both truck loads full…..

Love you champs …

Dad xx

Daily update for my boys 18 Dec 2013


Hello little men!

How are my little pals today ? I really hope well..

Well today a week Santa is coming to visit you both…. I bet you two are so excited … Would have loved to share in it with you both , but I guess that is not meant to be….

Boys you two missed such an amazing storm here last night , I can’t remember ever seeing rain like that ever in my life , we were sitting outside on the patio and it felt like we were inside a cave behind a waterfall that’s how heavy the rain was , everything feels so clean , fresh and bright today , it’s amazing , not sure why rain lifts our spirits so much in Africa but people seem happier and more energetic today as the day before , always amuses me to see….

I went to the mall today for some shopping , must admit not the best idea of the day , parking was a nightmare but then once I got inside the mall it did not seem that busy , so not sure where all the people were , lol…

Ouma’s cleaner is here now today I guess for the last time before the Christmas break so the house is turned upside down to get ready for Christmas , I guess Ouma’s biggest concern is laundry as she does not iron , lol , I guess that is an African thing again , must admit I have never touched an iron in my life either , I guess you two growing up in the UK with a mum that wants to live of state benefits you two will never have the luxury of having home support….

So I guess you two must just be clowning around getting ready for Santa now , whatever you two are doing I hope you are having loads of fun and lots of Christmas spirit ….

I guess mum would have gone to get you your new pj’s for Christmas Eve as she likes to do , never got that one to be honest but I guess we all have our silly family traditions , just so sorry you two will never get to share or experience any of my family … Maybe one day when you both are old enough to stand your ground against mum and Steve …

I still have not heard from your Solicitor to confirm if she has received the new court applications but at least the court has confirmed they got it so I assume all is in hand for round two of the contact battle to begin in Feb next year.

Well little boys I miss you both extra today not sure why , I guess it’s the realisation of being a week away from Christmas and I know I will not be allowed to see you or speak to you to wish you both a very Merry Christmas…. Going to be a hard couple of days … But I guess onwards and upwards and hope for some resolution on seeing you both in a normal environment one day…..

As always my little champs I hope to see you both a little later under our big old green African tree for our daily dream land meeting , can’t wait to hold you both and tell you how much I miss and love you both each day ……

Night , night little pals sweet warm happy Santa dreams , O and don’t forget you need to start getting your carrots ready for Rudolf , sure he will be starving by the time they hit Chester next week…

I love you both huge Santa slays full………

Love you little men….

Dad xx

Daily update for my Boys 17 Dec 2013


Hello Little Men!

How are my Champs doing today? I hope great…

The picture is care of Ouma again as she knows how much you both love Lion King , I need to try and see if I can get you the DVD in Zulu , I remember I went to the premiere in Pretoria when I was at university with friends , strange I still remember the chills from the surround sound in the cinema …. Funny how you remember silly little things like that, in total I think I must have seen the movie more than 20 times , lol , I guess you two must have well exceeded my record by now….

Well boys all the Court stuff is done and posted and emailed , the Court has already confirmed that they have received all six the emails , lol yes I know six is a lot but it is once again so many pages of evidence it was the only way of emailing it in batches…. So I guess now it is wait and see again what the future holds for us 3 and our possible relationship. Well I guess to be honest it can’t get any worse than what we have now ……

So what have you two silly Billy’s been doing today ? It’s such a nice day here again you two would have loved it , I guess the UK is not so great at the moment but I hope you both are wrapped up warm and cosy and at least able to have some indoor fun at the soft play …. You might even have a white Christmas as we had not seen any snow the past 2 years over the holidays … Should be fun to make a snow man again like we did in Feb this year in Horsham after that big snow , lol I still remember how cold you little hands were with the gloves but you did not want to come inside and just wanted to keep jumping on the soft snow ….. Good times hey boys …. Maybe one day again who know …. Let’s hope ….

So I am done with work now I think until next year , as I said I am looking forward to a good break after all that has gone on this year , just makes me really sad that I am not given the opportunity by mum to spend a little quality time with you both over my holidays …. I guess all part of her plan to make sure you two don’t know who I am , a bit silly and sad if you ask me , but hey that’s mum her way or no way as always……

Well little pals I really hope to see you both a little later under our big old green tree in dream land … Can’t wait to hear all about your day and give you both a double bear cuddle up side down… Makes me smile just thinking about it …. See you both a little later…

Boys I miss and love you both so , so much , please always know that…

Love you both ThiiiiiiiiiSsssssss much and more ……

Love you champs always….

Dad xx