Daily update for my Boys 31 May 2014

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Good evening Little Men!

Hope you both are great and had a lovely Saturday !

Sorry I am so late , I guess I have missed you before you went to bed ! I ended up going home with the Jenkings 5 and family for a braai after the big birthday bash … You both would have loved today , they had ice cream cake for Madison and two normal cakes for the twins , the place had a huge outdoor jungle-gym , jumping castle , and loads of other play park things even one that looked like an aircraft , I think the little ones had a great day as I did not see them sit or stand still for one minute 🙂 the goodie bags Justine made were also really nice I think all the little friends enjoyed them lots.

I passed by the Marx family en route this morning as I still had Jayden’s gift also to deliver , he made me smile as he is becoming more and more chatty with me now each time he sees me !

I think all the gifts went down well , so a job well done , four little ones have gone to bed tonight with big smiles and dreams of new adventures with all the new toys!

I need to phone the twins next weekend as that is their actual birthday so really looking forward to having a chat with them , sure they will have plenty to tell me about their week 🙂

Tomorrow I need to sort the last bit of my work stuff here and pack as Monday I am off again , the week has now really gone very quick but am looking forward to get back with my guys at the factory as I think June will be a good an interesting month for us all.

Well Champs , really sorry you missed out on a great party today , but maybe one day you can join as I am sure the twins would love having you both around for a bit of fun.

As always Little men , I will join you shortly under our big old green tree in dreamland , packing big party bear dream cuddles for you both ….

Night , night Champs …sweet dreams of lovely summer days …

Love you both lots and lots and miss you today mega lots more ….

Love you Little Men ….always …

Dad xx

Daily update for my Boys 30 May 2014

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Good evening Little Men !

How are my muppets today ? I hope very , very well ….

It’s been a busy day here , got all the shopping done for my trip , the house and the big birthdays tomorrow 🙂 I hope the little ones are going to like their gifts , the boys were easy as I just thought of what I would have bought for you both as you all are 3 now , the girls not so easy but Ouma came to help thus I am sure the little princesses will be happy also …

We had a stunning winters day here once more , I must say I did expect it to be a little cooler by now but no complaints from my side re this.

I got all my hotel bookings etc also for next month now so we are all ready to go it seems , it should be a good month , the lads are closing with some very positive numbers for May so I am really proud of them all they did a great job 🙂

Still no news from the Court Champs , thus I assume we will only hear back from them next week , but I will let you know as and when I get an update… Or new Court dates ….

I hope you two are ready for the weekend ! You must be full of plans and fun ideas of what you would like to go do …I just hope you are safe and oki doki ….

I will see if I can get some pictures of the little ones tomorrow , can’t believe how much they have grown the past 6 months , makes me sad as you both must have grown and developed just as much…….

So my little men , hope to see you both a little later under our big old green tree in dreamland …can’t wait for my big bear dream cuddles …

Night , night Champs …..happy dreams of a fun weekend , maybe with lots of fun dancing ;

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Love you both this …..;

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And miss you more ……

Love you Little Men ….always ….

Dad xx

Daily update for my Boys 29 May 2014

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Hello Little Men!

Hope you muppets are well and had a great day !

What a lovely winters day here again 🙂

This week has gone past really quick , can’t believe I have to almost pack already again ….

Ended up spending most of the day in front of my computer and on Skype again today , so much for a little me time this week , lol , but all good lots of good news and plenty of progress and that is the name of the game …. But this all means I have to hit the Mall tomorrow hard for the birthday shopping and some things for my trip and the house…..

I have looked at dates also , and as such have emailed the Court to say the next date I have free to go to jail and or the contested hearing would be last week of August, I had some other plans but that will have to wait , so we shall see what they say but I had to ensure we are all working to the same dates.

Been thinking a lot about you both today , wondering what you are doing and if you are safe and well…just have this gut feeling all is not as it should be , let’s hope my gut might be wrong for the first time ever! Just know you are in my thoughts and heart always …..

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Sorry champs , had a very long phone call from Dubai … Just now , so my chain of thought is broken on your email …

But I can’t wait to see you both later under our big old green tree in dreamland ….. Looking forward to my little O dream cuddles …

Night , night muppets ….happy dreams …..

Love you both lots and lots and miss you lots and lots and more lots more …

Love you Champs ….always …

Dad xx

Daily update for my Boys 28 May 2014

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Hello Little Men!

Hope my Champs are well and had a great day 🙂

It was ones again a lovely winters day ,more bright blue skies , a nice friendly warm sun as only an African winter can be ….

I have been tied up a little with work stuff most of today , so only managed a quick trip to the mall to go to the bank , but Ouma and I have decided to go shopping tomorrow , her and Oupa had a funeral today so I did not see them.

I had lots of good news work wise today , all the guys seem to be doing really well , looks like 2014 will be a good year for all , which is good news for sure….

No news today from the Court , I guess it might take a couple of days to get a new full listing date it seems.

I hope you both are making the most of your summer with plenty of outside play time and lots of visits to the park with B&B , they must be big by now also …. Hope you two are looking after them well and that you are keeping a good stash of treats for them 🙂

Oupa now have all the parts back for his DKW restoration project it seems , so looks like that will keep him busy the next couple of weeks , it might be done end of next month when I am back in South Africa again so will send you some pictures ones it’s all ready to hit the open road….

Well champs , as always I can’t wait to see you both a little later under our big old green tree in dreamland ….looking forward to some big double O dream cuddles and smiles ….

Night , night muppets …. Sweet dreams of long fun Summer days …. And plenty of ice cream stains on your shirts …lol

Love you both around the world and back and miss you to the moon and back …

Love you Champs ….always ….

Dad xx

Grief Management after the Narcissist

Let Me Reach with Kim Saeed

yellow tundra flower

The period after the Narcissist leaves or your implementing No Contact is often a time of not only shock, but of personal disaster.  It feels like you’re floating in the middle of the ocean, with no life preserver and no land in sight.  It’s also when you feel extremely alone, even if you are in the company of your children or well-meaning friends.

Along with other dynamics that developed in the toxic relationship, not being able to manage grief effectively is often a catalyst that sends people crawling back to their abuser or leaving the door wide open to months or years of further mistreatment.

Following are suggestions that will help you endure the state of disbelief you feel when the Narcissist finally leaves and files for divorce, or after you’ve implemented No Contact (and perhaps filed for divorce yourself).

processing grief

Let it Sink In

The most common reaction most victims…

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Deny, Attack, Reversing Victim and Offender (DARVO) in the Personality Disordered

Ostara gets a divorce

“I need to fax you the affidavit Ex filed, it is 66 pages long, and you need to respond ASAP” the para-legal told me over the phone.

Photo by Özge Gürer Photo by Özge Gürer

I went to a neighbor’s house and read the fax as it was coming in.

Line after line were false allegations. Accusations that had nothing to do with the truth, but everything with what Ex was doing himself. I was shocked. Surely he didn’t believe himself what he was accusing me of?

It was so bizarre, this couldn’t really be happening. The first 4 weeks after I was served with the divorce papers Ex filed numerous affidavits, over 130 pages in total; all unsubstantiated allegations, without supporting documents.

I was bewildered, how could somebody whom I thought loved me at least at one point, whom I had shared a life with, whom I had children with, could come out…

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A Resource For Men In An Abusive Relationship

Thank you for sharing the link Carrie I am sure it will give advice to many people 🙂

Ladywithatruck's Blog

http://www.heart-2-heart.ca/men/

The above link is to a site dedicated to men in an abusive relationship. I know the focus here is usually on the women who are being abused, only because that is the majority of the people who come here but I certainly know that men are abused also.

I took a quick peekaboo at this site and it seems like an excellent resource for men, honest and realistic. It give a safety plan for leaving, what to expect when you leave and how to deal with your abuser.

Hugs to all the men out there dealing with a narcissistic woman, I hope this is helpful.

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Daily update for my Boys 27 May 2014

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Hello Little Men!

Hope you muppets are doing very well….

I got some emails from Lancaster and Preston Court to confirm that tomorrow’s hearing is now definitely off until we receive direction from Judge Rawkins , the Court also confirmed that they received my open letter to Judge Rawkins and all the attachments and have passed these to him , so it seems now we wait and see how he wants to handle our case going forward. I will keep you post if I get any news in this regard 🙂

I had dinner with Ouma and Oupa tonight , they both send all their love and big cyber cuddles for you , O and I had some of your birthday cake ! I think you monkeys would have loved it , it is chocolate , very , very nice….

Had a fair bit of work stuff to sort today but I did manage to have a lie in, must be being back in my own bed … I slept well for the first time in ages …

Been able to also get my hair cut in the end , yes , yes I know I have been trying to go for weeks I know , but it is done now , lol , shirts are also in for pressing and folding so most of the domestic stuff on my to do list is now done ! , I think I need to sort a full time house keeper again 🙂

I am trying to see some friends also before I leave again , so looks like I am going to see B on Thursday after work , the J’s the weekend for the big birthday party and I will check with the M’s tomorrow as I still need to give J his birthday gift also as I have not seen them since he turned 3 last month , I see he had grommets done also now , but he seems oki doki 🙂

It was a great winters day here , bright , sunny and warm as winter should be in Africa ….

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How cool is this pic boys ? Really hope you two get to see them in real life one day soon ….

Tomorrow I need to go shopping for my trip and also the birthday gifts so a busy mall day ahead …should be fun …..

Well Champs , can’t wait to see you both later under our big old green tree in dreamland …packing you some more nice warm African winter bear cuddles ….

Night , night , dream big of fun days exploring the wild in Africa one day 🙂

Love you both truck loads full and miss you oil tankers full ……

Love you Little Men , Always …

Dad xx

Daily update for my Boys 26 May 2014

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Good evening Little Men !

How are my Champs tonight ? I hope great and that you both had a nice bank holiday ….

I just got home , looking forward to sleeping in my own bed if only for a couple days …

Have to get all my shirts starched and then pressed and folded again so I can pack the weekend as I am off on Monday again ….

Don’t have a great deal of news , had a good morning in Dubai , was 31 degrees at 5 am this morning so it seems Summer is now there in all it’s very hot glory 🙂 , but then getting home now , it’s winter a full 20 degrees so might have to get a jumper out tomorrow , lol

Well Champs , I am off to bed I think , so just want to wish you both a happy week and then as always I shall see you both under our big old green tree in dreamland just now …. Packing you some nice to be home winter double O dream cuddles …

Night , night Little Men …sweet dreams 🙂

Love you both lots and lots and miss you lots more …

Love you Champs ….always …

Dad xx