Subject: 7 June 2013 Mums Birthday !
> From: phillferreira@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
> Date: Fri, 7 Jun 2013 23:18:36 +0100
> To: .ferreira0511@xxxxxxxxxxx .ferreira2011@xxxxxxxxxxx
>
> Hello Champs !
>
> How are you two doing today , sorry I am late tonight , I had dinner at Jackie and Keith’s the people next door. They are such a nice couple , am sorry we did not get to know them a little better in the past year !
>
> You two would have had lots of fun with the dog and cat as they both just want to play!
>
> Well boys I hope you two gave mum a huge birthday cuddle and told her how much you both loved her ! I did text Mum this morning to say happy birthday and to say hello to you both but as normal she did not respond , feel strange as it is the 1st time in 5 years we have not been away from mums birthday , as I always tried to make her day special , last year we went to Leeds to watch dirty dancing in our own private box , I think mum liked it , was going to take her to Dubai this year for a couple of days as I know she would love to go back again …..
>
> Well I am on count down now , tomorrow a week I move to Horsham , feel still very unreal that I will be leaving this house , Horam and our memories of the last year , but I guess I need to start building a life again and the move will do me good i guess ,
>
> Can’t wait to start on your new room , I do want to make it really nice for you both in the hope that you might get to see it one day ….
>
> O i almost forgot , I got a letter from the home office today re my visa asking for loads of information , from mum , and re agreements about me seeing you both ,so I guess the good news here is that they are looking at my application , bad news is i don’t have what they are asking and I assume mum will not provide it in team , but at the end of the day I am sure it will all work out ok ….
>
> Well I hope you two and mum had a nice day and had lots of fun ….
>
> As always boys I will see you both under the big old green tree in dream land shortly , can’t wait for my dream cuddle … And to tell you both how much I miss as love you two ….
>
>
> Night night my little O’s , sweet dream ,
>
> Truck loads full of love and cuddles
>
> Dad xx
>
> Sent from my iPad

Subject: Fwd: Boys Birthday and the weekend contact From: phillferreira@xxxxxxxxxx Date: Sat, 18 May 2013 13:18:31 +0100 To: ferreira2011@xxxxxxxxxxx ferreira0511@xxxxxxxxx

From: Phill Ferreira <phillferreira@hotmail.com> Date: 18 May 2013 13:12:47 BST To: “jxxxxxx” <xxxxxxxxxxxx> Cc: “djl@wgs.co.uk” <djl@wgs.co.uk> Subject: Boys Birthday and the weekend contact

Hi Jayne , Hope you and the boys are well and having a nice weekend ! Deborah never heard back from Kerry  I assume on Friday night re seeing the boys for their birthday or over the weekend , so I assume you are not allowing the contact. Just to let you know i did send the boys cards and Birthday cake to Simons as I thought the boys will see them , I think you know I left the boys gifts  in the garage also when I saw them on the 4th , I did apologise to Simon for sending the stuff for the boys to his and have asked him to just bin it. I have cards from my Mum for the boys that I will post to your mum and Dad next week if you will let the boys have them , if not also just bin them I guess. I guess my mum will ring you or Pat and Steve’s house on Monday to wish the boys happy birthday but as normal if you will not allow this then just please ignore the call. Please wish the boys a very  happy 2nd birthday from me on Monday , please tell them I love them and  give the a cuddle if you don’t mind and please tell them that I am really sorry I am not part of their big day. Hope you all will have a nice day on Monday and that the boys will have lots of fun and laughter as little boys should on their Birthday. Take care, Phill

 Subject: 1 May 2013
> From: phillferreira@xxxxxxxxxx
> Date: Wed, 1 May 2013 20:47:56 +0100
> To: .ferreira2011@xxxxxxxxx .ferreira0511@xxxxxxxxxx
>
> Hello boys !
>
>
> How are you two doing today ? I hope really , really good as that’s how little men should be 3 weeks before the big 2  birthday !
>
> I wonder if you if you two have any idea you have big day coming up , I hope mum has planned a really nice day for you both , just a petty you not going to Harrison and Georgia , Arthur and Albert and the other little ones from Nursery around to make your day even more fun!
>
> I got the list from mum today of the stuff she wants to take from the house ,  I found it funny she wants to take all the new stuff and leave her old rubbish for me ! She also wants to take all your toys and Nursery stuff but I am afraid I had to say no to that request as I need the stuff for when you two are coming to spend time with me and also Ouma bought and paid for it all , I was really sad to see mum did not even ask for your big train set as she knows how much you both like to break it down ! I guess that is her way of saying you are not allowed it boys , but don’t worry I will put it in my new front room so we 3 can play with it as we use to!
>
> Mum said you are not sleeping on the floor at your horrible old grand parents where she has kept you hostage the last month , you where when I was there over the easter weekend , but if you are not then why does she want all your stuff from me , surly she has bought you cots by now and have not expected you to sleep on the floor for a month ! I kept asking before we went to see them to take your mattresses but mum kept saying your horrible nasty rude old grand mother bought you well … She took the padding of her garden chairs and wanted you to sleep on that !
>
> Boys I am so sorry that you both are having to go through all this not so nice stuff but this is the game your mum wants to play rather than speak to me and tell me what she wants , never good enough no matter what we will do for her ,,that’s why she can’t keep friends as she is so rude and cutting with them…
>
>
> Enough wining from me now , lol …
>
>
>
> You two would have had such a nice day here again , warm and sunny , almost 2,weeks now with no central heating!
>
> I so want to take you two to feed the duck and have a play in the play park …. One day I promise little men even if it is the last thing I ever do !
>
>
> I am sure you both are snoring your gorgeous little heads off , so I hope to see you both under the big green tree in dream land in a little while , least in my and your dreams I can hold you both and tell you how much I love you , always
>
>
> Night night little O’s and please remember I love you with all of my heart , each day more and I did not think that could be possible ….
>
> Love you both truck loads full , sweet dreams
>
> Dad xx
>

 Subject: Hello boys , today is 1 month before your 2nd Birthday !
> From: phillferreira@xxxxxxxxxxxx
> Date: Sat, 20 Apr 2013 22:18:23 +0100
> To: .ferreira2011@xxxxxxxxx; ferreira0511@xxxxxxxx
>
> O & O ,
>
>
> I am sure if you are reading this you would well know that your Mum and I separated on 1 April 2013.
>
> I decided today to start writing to you both each day from today , I will try my best to keep doing so as I am not sure how things will turn out with Mum and I getting divorced and me not having a visa yet to stay in the Uk. I guess all these questions we will have the answers too when you are reading these emails.
>
> I am sure Mum has her reason for taking you both away from me and not allowing me to have contact with you nor is she giving me any details re if you are doing well or not and I must admit it is breaking my heart but I can do nothing about it!
>
> I think the sad thing for me here as I sit alone in your nursery writing this email is that both of you will have no memory of the 1st 23 months of our life as a family, so please do not ever think I will think less either of you as you grow older and recent me for nor being around. All I can say to you both that I will fight until my last breath to get to see and be part of your life , but your Mum is telling the courts with the help of you horrible grand father that they fear that I might harm you , I think in this whole situation that is the thing that is hearing me the most but I can not fight them as they are all telling the same lies , and yes each story has 2 sides but never have I nor would I even dream of hurting either of you.
>
> Your Mum tells people that I am not interested in you but as I am sure you both know by now she is the control freak ! But be that as it may I am not writing to you to speak bad re Mum ,
>
> You both are going to laugh I went out yesterday evening after work to buy an IPad , something I vowed I would never do but I think just having the memory of you both fighting over my Blackberry play book to be able to watch “horsy horsy don’t you stop” on YouTube made me smile and I guess I am grabbing at straw to keep you both in my live. I am sure IPads are un cool now but was hip today ! Lol
>
> I also got your Birthday cards but have no clue where I can send them as I don’t know what you will be doing for your Birthday but I am sure Mum will make it fun and again so so sorry I will not be with you then but life is cruel and hard as you both shall learn.
>
> I have been looking today what I can get you for your birthday and in South Africa we would get you to start your horse or pony riding lessons but I am pretty sure your Mum will not allow that , I then thought maybe a puppy as you both are animal crazy but maybe a bit small to look after a dog just yet.
>
> So don’t despair I  am still looking , got the Thomas the tank engine wrapping paper all ready to go.
>
> My Mum and Dad , your Ouma And Oupa Who has only met you once at your christening , and yes they have many faults but are still heart broken that your mum will not allow you contact with them , I am going to give them your email ids also as I am sure they would also like to write you and maybe send you some pictures as I guess they both might have passed away by the time you would be old enough to read this , and boys if they don’t write to you don’t think bad of them they are trying to cone to grips with the fact that they way things are today they will never be able to see or have contact with you , but I can tell you both that in there own way they do love both very very much and would kill to be a part of your life on full time basis if they could , but I guess for now it will only be cards from time to time if your mum even gives them to you,
>
> Boys I am sitting here with eyes burning from crying my heart out over you and I don’t cry very easy so I vow going forward these email will be less tear full and more …. I don’t know what more boys as I do not think my heart has ever been this broken…. I know you will never understand this until and I hope you never do you have to live it.
>
> I hope you both had a fantastic day , I see mum posted some pictures of you both on farm and in the bath and you both look so very happy and un aware of what is going on and makes me feel like the outsider that has been forgotten already after 3 weeks , I know that is not the case don’t get me wrong but that is how it makes me feel.
>
> Well little men I assume you are both in dream land and as told you each night before bed ” see you under the big old green tree in dream land later” sweet sweet happy dream little men , big hugs and cuddles , I love you both more then what I think you both will ever know or belief!
>
>
> Night night my little super stars  , sleep well , love you both load xxxxxxxx2
>
> Dad
>
>
> Sent from my iPad

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Good afternoon little men!

I hope you both are doing great…..

We had a little bit of excitement today, Ouma and I went out early this morning and en route back the road was blocked and people were burning tyres and stuff in the road and protesting, not sure what it was about but we had to take a detour to get back home , just a normal day in Africa I guess..

Oupa has gone with his bike to the dam for the day with friends as it is such a nice day here today , he’s not done it for a while , so I assume he is felling better thus the outing…..

Not sure what you both have been doing today , I see you have had some heavy snow in parts the last couple of days so I really hope it is ok were you both are being kept hostage, I hope you both are warm and safe…..

Been procrastinating today with my admin stuff so will have to tackle that at some point later this afternoon, had some emails but still huge amounts of gaps in the information I have been given thus far…. These things take time and lots of it…..what to do ? , as they say….

I have not booked flights or hotel for the end of the month yet as I have still not heard from the contact centre and it seems your care giver has ignored the Court order again as no information has been served yet as per the time set out in the court order , am I surprised ? No , as in the last year your care giver has continued to cause delays and ignore the courts but it seems this is all ok , the fact that two little boys are suffering major abuse daily due to this control freak seems totally acceptable by the Uk courts and your solicitor…. So what I am trying to say champs is that I get the feeling as normal your care giver is trying to block the contact or at least leave it until it is to late for me to agree and then she and her spokesperson can tell the world again that I do not want to play by their rules to see you both…nice ” mother” then people ask me why she does not deserve to be called that ever! All my fault as normal I am sure….

So little muppets I wish you both a fun filled week next week , hope you have lots of nice things to see and do…… Hope little B&B are also doing well… Must be fun taking them for a walk if you have snow , sure they will find it very exciting……hope you have coats for them both if they go outside with you ….

I will see you both later tonight under our big old green tree in dream land , don’t be late , can’t wait to give you both a double dream cuddle……

Night , night pals , happy warm place dreams …..

Love you both more than TTTHHHHiiiiiiiiiiiSSSssssssssssss much and miss you both double that !

Love you little O’s

Dad xx

The word Mother brings many different thoughts and images to the mind of every individual on this planet.
Some of these are well-thought of, they are fond thoughts and memories.
Others are memories and thoughts of loss and disappointments, ill-wishes and hurtful times.

Everyone’s definition of Mother is slightly different than anothers.
There are some similarities that you can find and see, and that is usually where you get groups of people together who form names and titles for themselves as Mothers.

To some the definition of Mother is a woman who will stay home 24 hours of the day, 7 days out of the week to be with her children and raise them, watch them grow, and nurture their lives every waking moment of the day.
To others the definition of Mother is a woman who is willing to leave the home and work to support her family, to climb through corporate ladders or simply ring up customers at a local store to bring home financial gains for her family so that she knows they are secure and taken care of in the lifestyle she believes they should have.
Neither is wrong.

Some people believe that the true definition of a Mother is a woman who will breast-feed her baby throughout it’s infancy until the time for a bottle is proper.
To others they believe that the definition of a Mother is to be able to provide the best for their child through formula feeding for whatever reason they believe it should be and they do this with an educated decision – just like the breast-feeding Mothers.
Neither is wrong.

The definition of a Mother may mean to some a woman who will bring her children to Church and raise them within a religious household, pushing and guiding them towards a Truth they believe will set them free and allow them passage into a beautiful afterlife.
Others find that the definition of a Mother is a woman who will educate her child in many walks and many faiths and allow that child to make their choice – and support them even if it isn’t what she specifically believes in.
Neither is wrong.

Every single Mother here has a different definition of what makes her a Mother, just some of the examples above and so many more are the way we each define ourselves as Mother to our children and those around us.
The decisions we make are personally based and more often than not done after being educated about the different choices we can make – and we simply choose what we believe, feel, and know is best for our specific family.
There is absolutely no wrong in this.

Many women may read this an immediately feel themselves bristle at my assertion that there is no wrong in the view or parenting style that opposes or contradicts their own.
But ultimately this is the one true definition of a Mother that if you ever pass judgement on another woman who claims the title should be compared to and tried against:

A Mother will sacrifice everything and anything for her children and family – no matter what the cost or sacrifice.
A Mother will love her children unconditionally and support them through their lives to let them know that they are so loved.
A Mother will care for her children and give them her absolute PERSONAL best – not what society or others say she should do, but rather what she can personally provide and do for her children so long as it is the absolute best she can give them.
A Mother will teach her children to love.
A Mother will protect her child no matter what the personal cost.

Being a Mother leaves many different choices ahead of us as women, and decisions we make that will affect the lives of our children forever.

The best definition of a Mother is not given by other Mothers, but rather by children who through their eyes can describe what they believe a Mother is.

At times this definition is heart-touching and makes you feel all warm inside.
Other times it can turn your stomach what passes through a child’s lips to describe the definition of Mother they know.

That definition, the most pure, is something being formed every day by every action you make and every word you speak as your child looks up to you and begins to understand what exactly the definition of Mother is.

Be that loving, kind, supportive, open-minded, faithful, loyal, tender, intelligent, good cook, funny, thoughtful, and beautiful.
They can also be abusive, isolated, ill-tempered, frightening, distant, unreliable, bitter, immature, and untrustworthy.

Your child is the only one who can truly define Mother.
What definition are you showing them daily?

First, Let’s Define Dad

The words ‘dad’ and ‘father’ are very similar on the surface and yet, I think to many people they hold very different meanings. For the purpose of this article I’d like to define the difference in my eyes between a dad and a father.

Here’s Google’s definition of “dad”:

I disagree, Google. There is a difference between being a dad and a father.

A dad is someone that is there for his children. A father is something else; a father is more of a biological term than a role or relationship.

A dad is someone that is there for his children. A dad watches and actively participates in their lives. A dad helps them grow up, raises them, nurtures them, attends dance recitals and baseball games and is present.

Next, Let’s Define Father

On the surface you’d think the definitions between dad and father would be the same – but they’re not. They are very different, in fact.

A father is something else; a father is more of a biological term than a role or relationship. A father is a the birds and bees version of a parent. They are a reproductive assistant, if you will. Father’s need only contribute the biological components necessary to produce the child. After that, the their role and obligation to the child is over.

A father doesn’t need to be present to have a have a child. They don’t need to participate to make their biological contribution. A father doesn’t need to be present to be a father. Therein lies the difference when attempting to define the difference between a dad and a father. Of course, this distinction is my own and you may or may not agree or buy into my differences. Though, I know there are single moms out there that know there’s a distinctive difference between the two. They see every single day what the differences are between being a dad and being a father mean to their child’s

How would you define what a father means to you?

To me, it’s a man who loves his kids enough to let them make mistakes. A father is a guide and teacher, but he also cares enough to say “no” to his child even when he or she might hate him for it in the moment. That’s because a father tries to do the right thing, not the easy thing.

Part of the “father mystique” to me is that dads often keep a sense of playfulness and fun about them, no matter how old they get. My husband will roll around on the floor wrestling with our son at the drop of a hat — or race shopping carts through the parking lot of our local grocery store, whooping with joy. (The best part is that he doesn’t care if he looks silly — or what people think of him.)

Most importantly, a father is someone who loves their kids even when they’re at their worst — and who never loses faith in them.

Here’s to all the fathers out there who are making a difference in the eyes of the kids who love them. The big things you do are important, but I would wager that it’s those small, simple things that your child will remember for the rest of his or her life.

Read more: http://www.empoweringparents.com/blog/family-holidays-vacations/definition-of-a-father/#ixzz2s8rDb7kK